We Like Wrestling: Issue #5
Mission Statement: The purpose of this column is to put together a regular collection of the moments from wrestling that we love that continue to remind us wrestling just why in fact we do like wrestling. After each wrestling show that you watch, whether it be Raw, Impact, Smackdown, NXT, ROH, or anything else, I simply request that you send in whatever highlights you have. What made you smile? What made you forget that you’re an internet know it all and cheer audibly from your couch? It can be anything from something as simple as Santino mispronouncing someone’s name to a title changing hands. Anything. Just tell me what you liked and why you liked it. Hopefully, reading this others may realize they enjoyed your highlight as much as you enjoyed theirs and together we can all continue to enjoy wrestling as much as ever.
We’re officially well into the road to Wrestlemania as well as the build to TNA’s Lockdown. These next few weeks should be among the best in wrestling all year. If you’re not watching every wrestling program from the two major companies that you can get your hands on then you’re doing yourself a disservice. So let’s start with Raw and see what people were loving on this week.
Debo: GREAT OPENING SEGMENT TO RAW IN A VERY LONG TIME! SO MUCH BLOOD! TRIPS! POSSIBLE HEYMAN V VINCE MATCH AT MANIA! I LOVED EVERY MINUTE OF THAT OPENING SEGMENT.
RYBACK AND ZIGGLER HAD A GOOD MATCH TOO. I LOVED THEIR WORK TOGETHER. VERY ENTERTAINING. I SEE MYSELF BECOMING A RYBACK FAN MORE AND MORE. AND WWE IS DOING A GREAT JOB OF MAKING US FORGET ZIGGLER HAS THE MITB BRIEFCASE BY MAKING HIM LOSE SO MUCH, THAT WAY WHEN HE CASHES IN IT WILL BE A BIG SURPRISE….MAYBE AT MANIA AFTER JACK THWAGGER LOSES.
I LIKED THE PTP VS TEAM HELL NO MATCH AS WELL. PRETTY FUNNY STUFF, AND ANYTIME THE PTP ARE ON MY TV SCREEN IM GLUED.
AND LAST BUT CERTAINLY NOT LEAST CM PUNK VS JOHN CENA. WOW WHAT AN AMAZING MATCH. I MEAN THAT WAS WRESTLEMANIA QUALITY STORYTELLING RIGHT THERE! AND YES I KNOW I HAVE BEEN TYPING IN ALL CAPS BUT I AM THAT FUCKING EXCITED ABOUT THAT SHIT. THESE 2 NIGGAZ WENT OUT THERE AND WENT HAM! I MEAN THAT WAS A MATCH OF THE YEAR THAT WE GOT TO SEE FOR FREE. I MEAN WE GOT COUNTLESS NEAR FALLS, A PILE DRIVER, AND JOHN FUCKIN CENA DID A FRANKENSTEINER…WELL ATTEMPTED IT, BUT IT WAS A GREAT FUCKIN ATTEMPT! FOR THE FIRST TIME THIS YEAR I AM ACTUALLY EXCITED ABOUT WRESTLEMANIA.
FUCK TNA, FUCK SMACKDOWN, FUCK EVERYTHING ELSE….THAT LAST MATCH WAS A KEEPER NIGGA.
Even though most of us saw that HHH/Brock clash coming it was still well done. It was exactly as most people pictured but Brock getting busted really helped add some legitimacy to the moment. Ryback is a great upper midcarder right now with potential to go either depending on how they handle him from here. I agree about Ziggler probably not cashing in until either Wrestlemania or just right after. I did think he was going to derail this Swagger vs Del Rio match somehow but it looks like we’re going full steam with that still.
As for Cena and Punk…obviously that was the match of the night/week/month/possibly year. The next day I went back and made my wife watch the piledriver. I tried to explain why it was such a big deal but I’m pretty sure it meant nothing to her. She did however think the hurricanrana by Cena was “athletic” so maybe I’m just focusing on the wrong highlights with her.
Tyler Davenport: Very obvious choice would have to go to Cena v Punk in the main event of Monday Night Raw. Just an amazingly fun match watch and worthy of every line of praise it gets, which I’m sure will be a lot. Another quick note would have to be Daniel Bryan’s acting. He has this little kid quality about him after matches that is perfect for his character. Whether it’s having an over the top celebration or pouting it just seems to work.
Even though Daniel Bryan is a part of a major storyline I still feel like what he’s doing is flying under the radar. His acting is great, his in ring work has stayed consistently great, and his character development has put him miles ahead of where he was just over a year ago. When they’re ready I have no doubt that they will be able to thrust him back into the world title scene with ease.
- My favorite moment of Raw was when they replayed the Wreatlemania 21 commercial.
- HHHs wet pants tell me one thing… I never want to wrestle that guy! Nothing worse than a mouthful of ball sweat durring a powerbomb.
- I like everything Brad Maddox does. That creepy little fuck is awesome. I also like Kofi Kingstons kickpads. He wears them so the Boogyman doesn’t try to eat his legs.
I’m still not sure what the point of running that old commercial really was but not once did I think about fast forwarding it. Brad Maddox may be the most underappreciated on screen talent right now. He has never been on screen for anything less than a golden moment. I still don’t know how well this guy can hang in the ring but outside of it he’s can’t miss material. As for HHH…was it ball sweat? Was it water? Was it pee? I know if someone had just sent me down the ramp to face Brock and then in the midst of things I busted him open that badly…it’d be pee.
- Intro / HHH vs Lesnar: Thank you for Lesnar bleeding. Things like that serve to remind us of what wrestling can be: a gigantic bloody mess where two guys swap more bodily fluids by fighting than most people do during sex. I just wish Heyman had gotten more shots on Vince. Great ring attire for Heyman too.
- The Shield: They pose a great question – what’s next for them now that they defeated the superfriends? Shaemus, Orton, and Ryback again?
- Mark Henry: I’d much rather see Henry vs Ryback or Ziggler at Mania than Khali. Honestly I’d much rather see Henry vs Hornswoggle at Mania than Khali.
- Jerry does not need to be eating tater tots or drinking sugar.
- Swagger’s music is still good. The MizTV segment went a little long, but did what it was supposed to. Honestly they could go WAY farther with this angle and they’re not for obvious reasons. Waiting for Swagger to show up with DHS or a “local militia” to deport Ricardo. Better yet, just have a cut-away where Ricardo is the victim of a Drone Strike. LONG LIVE THE AMERICAN EMPIRE.
- Punk vs. Cena: I will give Cena the credit for hitting a very bad Hurricanrana (or Frankensteiner depending on how you call it). Pretty much everything else in the match goes to Punk. When Cena “reversed” a Vise into a Crossface, Cole still called it an STF. Of course this is the same guy who throws out stuff like “tilt-a-whirl backbreaker” so whatever.
Best part of the match by far: Punk’s Piledriver. Thank you based Punk, Wrestling God, for literally trying to murder and / or paralyze John Cena. Looking at it again – Punk laid back quite a bit and let Cena slide down enough to almost make it a half-powerbomb. At best Cena impacted on his upper back. And of course “Vince is furious” because his little boy Johnny could have gotten hurt. That just makes it even better. Thank you Punk for reminding us that Wrestling is dangerous.
We’ve thrown multiple combinations of the best wrestlers at The Sheild and they’ve come up victorious. Not sure where it goes from here but it feels like they have a plan and I’m all in for the ride especially when so many of the other feuds currently going on feel predictable. I don’t think we’ll see Henry vs Khali. I think Khali is just filler to buy time until it gets closer and they can establish his next feud. I’ve heard Jericho’s name thrown around as a possibility and I’d be all for that.
Tristan Paulus: What I like about wrestling is getting PPV-quality matches on Raw/Smackdown every once and a while. My main example is the awesome match between John Cena and CM Punk this past Monday, and it was just that: Awesome. You could feel the emotion and passion coming from both characters, each one knowing just winning that one match would take either one of them to the main event of Wrestlemania 29 to face the The Rock for the WWE Championship. Aside from the storyline aspect of it, the match was wrestled great. With a lot of pin attempts, numerous kick outs, and not too many rest holds. This was a match that, if you were invested in the feud and story emotionally, had you expressing some form of emotion physically. I myself was counting along with the ref on a few pin attempts. And no, the match wasn’t perfect, but it had that PPV-quality to it, and the reaction to it was very positive from what I saw. It didn’t matter who you were pulling for, you knew you had watched a very great match. Every once in a while, we’ll be treated to great matches like these; ones with passion, great action, and brilliant storytelling. Matches like these take me back to past great matches between the same/other superstars and reminds me why I like wrestling!
This match really did have a little bit of everything. I’m ok with the kickout from finishers when it’s between two major talents but even without those this match had enough “what will it take to put this guy away” type moments. That match alone should be enough to get people excited about Wrestlemania because the idea is that we should be getting a lot more of that kind of match.
Of course Jamie Rubet summed it up a lot quicker than I have been able to…
Jamie Rubet: HOLY SHIT!!! WHAT A MATCH!!! 5 stars. That is all.
We all thought that. Jamie Said it.
Tracy Sasser: I’m not a regular viewer, so please overlook my ignorance of all things Impact.
Their Knockouts fake tatas are way overdone, but their matches are a lot better than the Divas’.
Also, I miss blond Sting. He was the best.
I would pine for James Storm if he always wore a ponytail and baseball cap AND NEVER SPOKE.
Wait, are Uggs approved wrestling gear now??? Shit, dude all I need is a gimmick and I’m set! Tina Turner be layin’ the smack down on Gut Check!
Why does Jeff Hardy have two title belts? He needs a new Avon rep.
You really ought to tune in more often. TNA is being overlooked at a time when they’re doing some great stuff and as they take the show on the road it’s only going to get better in my opinion. TNA is a lot better than most people realize and give them credit for and if you stay tuned to this very site I just might show you why in the near future. But for now let’s let our star contributor Kevin Matchstick break it down for us.
- Show opens with Bully saying Hulk is “really bad.” We can only hope it’s so bad that he’ll never be on TV again. Brooke Hogan is pretty hot with makeup though – makes me wonder how much work she’s had done on behalf of daddy paying for it. While I would buy a sex tape, I still would not buy one of her records.
- The “love” between Hardy and Bully is signifying something; hopefully something important. Whether it means A&8′s will interfere or someone’s turning heel, I don’t know. It’s not often you have two faces going against one another for the top belt. While Bully’s face status is probably cemented in the minds of most people, to me this is still the guy who powerbombed a 70+ year old Mae Young through a table. Much like Kane tombstoning a priest, that’s the kind of stuff you just don’t forget.
That being said, Bully is the best he’s ever been. Say whatever you want about his ring work, mic work, whatever – he is literally in his prime at 41 years of age. He has come a long way from the ECW and the early WWF days. Maybe it’s politics that has put him in the spotlight, but I am always impressed when I see him.
- Speaking of people at the top of their game. Chris Daniels and Kazarian, my god. Want to talk about folks who have come a long way? Two guys not very interesting on their own have turned into TNA’s funnier, edgier version of team Hell No. Daniels sells as well as Ziggler and Kazarian takes MASSIVE bumps. Both of them are excellent on the mic, Daniels in particular.
- KO division is still better than Divas.
- Say whatever you want about Sting, he is still amazing. Abyss still doing great acting work as Park. Surely some of the smarks got a kick out of their exchange, although when Sting said “Kayfabe” he pronounced it “Kay-Fahb.” SHIT, DO I NOT KNOW THIS PIECE OF INSIDE WRESTLING KNOWLEDGE? IS STING TRYING TO MINDFUCK ME? The IWC goes insane, news at 11. Also who knew Matt Morgan was this good on a promo?
- As much as I love RVD, I think he has been mailing it in for a while. I can remember him being on a TNA promo and saying, “Everyone asks me when I’m gonna do another Van Terminator – you gotta buy the pay per views!” Yup, and I don’t think he’s done one since he’s been in TNA. RVD was a good wrestler back in the day, but let’s be honest that he might as well be just collecting a paycheck now. I give him the respect for what he’s done, but as for what he’s doing? Just going through the motions.
- Wow, Eric Young on Team TNA? I didn’t think he had a job any more. What the hell does this guy do for a living that allows him to take such a long time off?
- Gut Check: Check the size on this Tonga / Tapa / Huge Samoan chick – how often do you see a female monster heel besides Kong? The other girl is pretty amped – she keeps things moving at a brisk pace. Tapa looks like she’s moving in slow motion – just no pop or aggression in her moves. Kind of disappointing. If Rocky taught us one thing, it’s that the Samoan Drop is not a finisher. Commentary mentions that “SHE’S SAMOAN, YOU CAN’T HURT HER HEAD,” I love it. Still though, tapping out for your gut check? Way to bury this chick. Oh well, I was really expecting more.
- AJ: WE HEEL NOW. Gainesville, GA is actually a pretty rough place in reality – plenty of meth labs in those trailer parks. Clean cut AJ has a heavy shadow and messed up hair now. Wish they had shown him wearing a mustard-stained tank top and drunkenly beating his wife while their 6 kids cry in the background of their double wide. Would have been closer to what Gainesville is actually like.
- Robbie Feud: Glad they could figure something out to give these guys something to do. Their act was getting pretty stale. Rob Terry is pretty fucking beastly – remind me why he’s not a monster heel? Him and Matt Morgan need to tag or feud.
- Main Event Tag Match: The back body drop that Ray gives Kazarian in this match is possibly one of the biggest ones I have ever seen. Kazarian takes another IMMENSE bump in this match, but it’s hard to remember exactly where with so many high spots. Everyone in this match does remarkably well, and every spot is well done. Entire match is very well paced and very well put together. I’m not a huge fan of Jeff, but it looks like the time off (since he couldn’t go to the UK) did him some good. Insanely good match, easily on par with Cena vs Punk on Raw this week, although for different reasons.
I think Kevin just nailed several of my points for me. Strong undercard, superior women’s division, decent enough intrigue in the main event. Impact is good folks. It’s just on the verge of being great. I don’t know what it will take to put it over the edge. It might be attempting to capture that WWF/Attitude era nostalgic feeling that everyone is looking for and getting away from the WCW/now feel that they’ve been riding on. If you don’t believe me just ask Jeromy Taylor…
Jeromy Taylor: I must say that I believe that TNA finally had the superior product. I enjoy the stories they are selling. What I did not like was when Jeff Hardy made that speech to Rush Limbaugh about how his thoughts are just part of a make believe show to create a story. Hardy stated- “except for me having a brother named Matt…I guess that carries over in both worlds…” I don’t know how this Hardy/Limbaugh feud started but you can bet your ass Vicodin was involved!
Yeah…I think that was where my point was going.
Apparently nobody watched Smackdown. I’d scold you all but as of this writing I haven’t either. I’m sure it was good. Of all the wrestling shows on television…it’s definitely one of them.
That’s it for this week. Thank you all for the submissions and please keep those positive notes coming my way!
As always, I can only hope that reading this helps remind you why We Like Wrestling.